What if I told you that there’s a way to make your teenager more empathetic, more responsible, and less stressed out?  Sounds like a pretty great combination, doesn’t it?  We have two sons.  In most cases, the older one (Lucio) is more responsible and the younger one (Renzo) is more empathetic.  Yes there are exceptions, but in general, that’s how it goes.

Take the bedtime questions on a Friday night, for example.  Before going to bed, the older one wants to know:  What’s the plan for Saturday?  Do I need to wake up early for practice?  What time should I set my alarm clock for?  Lucio will even figure out his laundry situation if he’s making plans for Saturday evening.

Our younger one, on the other hand, rarely sets an alarm clock and does not even have a dirty laundry pile.  Instead, Renzo has a pile of clothes that he pulls from when he wakes up.  And, because he usually picks the clothes that are on top, it’s not uncommon to see him wearing the same clothes two or three days in a row.

Before going to bed on Friday, our younger one will ask his mom to scratch his back or tell him about her day.  He’ll want to know if my jiu jitsu injury is better now.  He’ll ask his mom what the perfect Mother’s Day gift would be, even though Mother’s Day is still a month away.  And, Renzo always calls our American Bulldog, Lola, up to his room.  Lola comes running, jumps on his bed and snuggles right up to him.

Although our older son is very responsible, he could use a little more empathy.   The solution has been Lola…that’s right, our American Bulldog. 

Having a pet has encouraged empathy in Lucio like we’ve never seen in him.  If it weren’t for Lola, we would never see our older son express so much affection and love.  Some days he comes home from school and is a pretty rude teenager.  He says nothing to his mom, throws his bag on the living room floor, and goes straight to the refrigerator.

But, then he softens up and yells, “Lola, sweetie, where are you?  Come here.”  He gets down on his knees and pets her and hugs her and scratches her belly.  You’ll never catch our older son snuggling up to his parents, but you can see him lying on the floor with his arm around her while she licks his face.  Our younger son also does this with Lola, but we’re not surprised to see our younger one so affectionate.

We are surprised by how responsible Renzo can be with our dog.  He’ll change her water bowl, feed her, pick up the poop in the backyard, walk her around the block and even brush her.  In a strange way, I think he likes the rules that have come with Lola.

Lola doesn’t really like rain storms so a friend gave us an anxiety jacket for the dog.  I know…I know…sounds crazy, but the jacket basically provides a calming hug, and it really works!  Who wouldn’t want a calming hug?  Anyway, our younger son might not be able to find matching socks in his bedroom, but he can always find Lola’s anxiety jacket for her.

Having a pet not only encourages empathy and promotes responsibility.  Having a pet also reduces stress.  Pet owners have lower blood pressure, heart rate, and heart disease. During final exams week, our high school brings in therapy dogs.  The kids get to play with them between classes, and they LOVE it!

Honestly, I wasn’t the biggest pet lover before we got Lola.  But, I’m a new man!  She’s as much a part of our family as anyone else.

If you’re on the fence about this, start with a hamster or goldfish.  Get a cat if you’re not looking for the responsibility of walking a dog or letting it out.

The whole family can discuss the pros and cons and make the searching process enjoyable. If you’re looking to increase your teens empathy and responsibility, and if you’re looking to reduce their stress, try getting a pet.

Let’s hear it. What are your thoughts on having a pet in the family?